So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
