Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize