You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
