oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize