hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize