I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
