Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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