is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Randomize
