whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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