she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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