I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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