the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
