All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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