You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
