I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
