well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
