Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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