She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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