How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize