glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
