I'm drive I can fine osifer
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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