Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
