garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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