No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
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