he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
