I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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