p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
