so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize