Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
