Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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