he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize