Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize