Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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