i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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