I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
