see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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