This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
