he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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