She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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