You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
