After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
