I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
