I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
my liver is dry heaving
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
