Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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