is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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