I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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