Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Can I color on your dick again?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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