i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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