Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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