I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize
