Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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